The 4 AM Wake-Up Call
Last night I woke up again while it was still dark outside. Almost as soon as I realized I was awake, the anxious thoughts started whirling around in my mind. After 10 minutes or so of tossing around on my bed I finally got up and looked at my cell phone. Yup. It was my 4 am wake-up call from Anxiety again.
I wish I could say that, with all my experience with meditation, Reiki and yoga that I used one of these methods to clear my mind so I could go back to sleep. But, as anyone who suffers from anxiety can tell you, once anxious thoughts start coming they whir around faster and faster in your head until they flood the sensible, rational part of your brain. I can't think clearly enough to stop the storm while I'm thinking too much.
Unfortunately, there is always something to be anxious about. Did I pay that bill? Did I help yesterday's client with her tarot reading, and did I say the right things to help her understand? Did I say too much in that blog article, and did I interpret that Tarot card correctly? Is that noise I just heard a burglar or my cat trying to open the kitchen cabinet again? Am I just kidding myself that I can do the things I do, or am I a failure?
When anxiety thrives, there is only one thing that helps to calm my fears: Tarot readings. So, I get up and seek clarity in a tarot reading, or five, or ten, until I can go back to sleep again.
Tarot is my path to understanding. When I need to understand a situation - especially a situation that I'm anxious about - I use Tarot to guide me. Celtic Cross is the best spread to show me everything I need to know about a situation, but one-card, three-card, Spiritual Guidance and Relationship spreads work, too.
To help dissolve my anxious thoughts, I just need to understand what is really going on in a situation - not what my worry is telling me, but the actual truth. Tarot is like a best friend with a lot of wisdom, giving me advice without any bias. Tarot tells me what has happened, what's happening now, how the situation is likely to develop and what part I and others are playing in this situation. Once I can see the issue clearly I can decide what to do. Even if the news is bad news (and sometimes it is), at least Tarot can tell me what I might do differently to change the outcome. Tarot is kind but honest - if the situation is out of my control, Tarot will tell me that, too. So, at least I know. And knowing gives me a little feeling of control. At least, enough to let me relax a little and go back to sleep.
Tarot readings help to inform and educate about a situation or issue. Education can bring peace. As Confucius said as far back as 500 B.C.: "Education breeds confidence. Confidence breeds hope. Hope breeds peace." So the next time I get my 4 am wake-up call, I know what to do.